No Tricks...Only Treats

As Halloween approaches and the school year is ending its first quarter, both Sarah and I can say we are happy with Elijah's progress. His social-skills therapy (which took place at, as he called it, "the playhouse") has ended for the time being, and it has, without question, moved him forward in his limited interpersonal relationships. A wave and "hello" at a first meeting are much easier for him, and his goodbyes at school are always punctuated with a hug a proper farewell. There are still mistakes and some awkwardness, but there is no doubt progress as well.

Another example of how far Elijah has come occurred at a local park, where he shared the see-saw with another child (after first asking if he could play with him) and had a very sweet interaction with a baby girl. She had grabbed a tennis ball Elijah was playing with, and when her mother took it from her to return it to Elijah, she started crying hysterically. Elijah, sensing how upset she was, walked over and gave the ball back to her, which put a smile on both of their faces.

As wonderful as that scene was, something even more special happened later that night when we went to our favorite restaurant for dinner. While we were waiting for a table, Elijah walked up to another little girl who had been playing at the park that day and said hello and asked her if she had been at the park. Although her "yes" was delivered with a look that will serve her well 20 years from now when she tells a guy at a bar to get lost, the fact that Elijah recognized her and initiated a conversation without prompting was a major step forward.

Because of the incredible weather, we have been making trips to a park (as well as taking endless walks through various housing developments in our area to view the cul-de-sacs and the basketball goals that populate them) as part of our weekend routine. Last week, a visit to another park (this one by my office) yielded both an attempt at kite flying (unsuccessful) and some down time with Mom. And of course, some time on the swings as well.

During all of these activities, Elijah has been more engaged and aware of both situations and people around him. Even though there is much whining about a variety of subjects, he is quite clear as to what

he likes (listening to "Smooth" by Santana in the car at least twice in a row) and what he doesn't appreciate (the fact that he cannot eat "unhealthy food" for every meal.) These give- and-takes may not seem like much, but compared with our interactions with him even a year ago, they show the incremental steps forward that give us great hope for the future.

Then there are those moments when things don't go as we hope. Last weekend, our health club held its annual Halloween party. We thought it would be a great idea to ask Elijah's friend Janey to join us, and Elijah loved the idea.

Dressed in costumes, the two of them seemed to be

having fun. Elijah got to rock-climb, and he and

Janey played in the bouncy house for quite a while. But then Elijah, being Elijah, insisted they watch a movie and then go play a computer game (a variation on his latest obsession, "Angry Birds") at the child center. Janey, being more patient than any child should be, agreed to this, and when it was time to leave was happy to come back to the house for some lunch and more playtime. Elijah would have none of that! He insisted she go home immediately, and when this demand was denied, he went crying up to his room.

Realizing (as he always does) that this behavior was not going to change anything, he came

downstairs and proceeded to draw with Janey as they watched "Alice in Wonderland."

We later found out part of the reason for Elijah's bad behavior was that he was hoping that another little girl from his school would come over, and I guess he was fearful that the two would meet. That playdate was finalized today, and the two will hopefully have a fun time tomorrow (the little guy has been smiling all day since he got the news!). The fact that he really wants his playmates to come over (after some unnecessary drama) and that these little girls are so sweet and understanding about his quirks, is something very special and couldn't make us happier.