Why Kung Fu Panda is no Winnie the Pooh

I will admit that I enjoy watching movies more than reading. I also will fess up to enjoying the films To Kill a Mockingbird and The Godfather more than the novels, although in both cases it was incredible performances that made it so. I can also state, I think without too much debate, that perhaps the worst film adaptation of a great book was Bonfire of the Vanities, which turned one of the lead characters, an old Yiddish judge, into Morgan Freeman (?!) thus destroying one of the major subplots.


So I was somewhat hesitant when I took Elijah to go see the film version of Where the Wild Things Are, a classic children's book that consists of maybe 100 words, yet was over an hour and a half long as a movie. We had already experienced Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, which besides the title, shared little with the book we read together on many nights. My fears about the Maurice Sendak classic turned out to be well founded. Although Elijah seemed to enjoy the movie (though restlessness was evident on occasion) the charm of the book was completely lost in the midst of what I would call a movie not about childhood escape but about monster angst.

As draining as watching the tortured souls of the "Wild Things" was (the anguish of new friends, old relationships and anger management were constant topics for discussion), it was a joy compared to the "live action" versions of the Dr. Seuss classics How the Grinch Stole Christmas and The Cat in the Hat. Whoever was responsible for those travesties needs to be locked in a room for a weekend and be forced to view them over and over again.

Since Elijah's arrival, I have watched enough cartoons and kids movies to revisit my childhood many times over (OK, I'll admit I owned a lot of those films already) and unlike most of today's stuff, it holds up pretty well. Even after viewing the cartoon Grinch numerous times, both Elijah and I can still enjoy it a great deal, which is not the case with just a repeat viewing of Fly Me to the Moon (even with the 3-D). The Disney "Classics," the original Horton Hears a Who cartoon, and the Peanuts Trilogy (Charlie Brown Christmas, Thanksgiving and Great Pumpkin) show what a child's cartoon film should be about....entertaining fun, memorable music and no more than 80 minutes long.

California.... There We Went

First off I have to apologize to any blog purists who may peruse this site. I am probably violating every rule of blog etiquette by posting out of chronological order, as my previous entry concerned Halloween and our trip out west was the prior week. If everybody is okay with that...let's head for L.A.

Airplane travel with Elijah, though challenging at times, had been made much easier by markers, loads of paper and a portable DVD player (pictured above) loaded with a supply of his favorite films. In fact, concern about his behavior actually has made flying more enjoyable for me as I don't have time for my usual airplane neuroses to kick in. So after a non-eventual flight (unless one considers the reshaping of the United States important - check out the previous post on that subject) we arrived at LAX to begin our real trek, the drive to the Valley.

We all remember those math questions from our school days that started, "If a train leaves from the station at 1:00 traveling at 80 miles per hour and a car leaving from an opposite direction travels at 60 miles per hour, they will meet where?" but on this last trip I discovered a new variation on this theme. If a plane leaves Kansas City going to LAX and at the same time a family in a rental car leaves LAX for the San Fernando Valley, who will arrive at their destination first? The answer: Although the flight was the quicker trip, the time differential was less than 20 minutes.

Okay, now that I got my traffic gripe out of the way, I'd have to say that this was one of our best trips back home. We stayed with my sister and her husband, whose generosity knew no bounds. Our base camp for the trip was their guest house (or, as Elijah called it, "the little house at Aunt Kathy's") which not only afforded us privacy and a pool for little guy to jump into, but also relieved us from the stress of us worrying about (very) early morning risings and the effect on our hosts. We spent lots of time with family and kept our driving to a minimal amount (in Los Angeles terms). And the weather was incredible...shorts everyday and a comfortable beach day in LATE OCTOBER!

Elijah battled the waves to a draw but vowed to return and beat them back from the shore at our next beach visit.

As with any trip with a child, there were a couple of meltdowns (one involving a hysterical Elijah using a public restroom had me fearful of authorities busting into our stall and taking me away in cuffs) but as he always does, our little guy adapted to his surroundings and had a good time. He got to see Grandma and Grandpa (whom he now recognizes) again, as well as Uncles Ken and Marv and Aunt Kathy. He also got to visit "Miss Judy's house," meet cousins and dance one more time with Doctor Branch, a client of mine who just turned 101.

He also got to leave his mark as an artist, as a blue IHOP sign and various color drawings he created were left up on walls until our departure (note to Aunt Kathy and Miss Judy, I won't tell Elijah if you want to take them down now). As I said before, it was a great trip and just one more step on Elijah's path of life.

To Infinity......and Beyond

As Halloween approached this year, we were faced with a problem -- a child who did not want to be in costume or go trick-or-treating. The idea of dressing Elijah as a chimney sweep (never high on Sarah's list) had fallen off the radar as the Little Guy (finally) tired of "Mary Poppins." Since he was constantly going around the house dancing and singing "If I Only Had a Brain" from the the Wizard of Oz, I thought dressing up as the Scarecrow would interest Elijah, but that idea was also met with indifference. It got so bad that Sarah asked the teacher at Elijah's school if there was a way to opt out of class on the Friday before Halloween, as everybody was supposed to be costume for a school parade.

I've heard of parents asking that their children be excused from, say, sex education classes, but Halloween parties and parades? That's a new one! Then I got an idea. On the plane ride out to Los Angeles and numerous times while we were there, Elijah had asked to watch "Toy Story." He was so enamored of the film that I had to ask him, "Would you like to be Buzz Lightyear for Halloween?" Just like in a Hail Mary pass at the end of a game, we connected, with a resounding "YES!" from the Little Guy. So two days before the big day, we sojourned to a costume store and got one of the last Buzz Lightyear costumes available.

To say Elijah got into the holiday spirit would be a minor understatement. He couldn't wait to put on his costume and reap the rewards. There was a show-and-tell scheduled for his class the same day as the parade and he eagerly rehearsed his speech using his "Woody" doll, but later wanted it amended to include Jessie (another character from the film). Also, according to Sarah, he was quite proud when some other kids pointed out how "cool" his costume was.

But that was a controlled environment as opposed to the dog-eat-dog world of neighborhood trick-or-treating, but my fears were unfounded. I am happy to report that an exercise that usually took all of twenty minutes and included maybe a half dozen houses, was a two hour excursion that took in most of our immediate neighborhood. Proudly announcing "My name is Buzz Lightyear and I come in peace" or Buzz's catchphrase (the title of this blog), the little guy happily rang doorbells and collected candy.

Of course there were a couple of minor faux pas. One was Elijah's insistence of not just standing on the porch of a house but walking right in and taking a look around. Another was his lack of understanding that the bowl of candy being offered was not just for him exclusively, and that he wasn't suppose to grab a handful at every house. But outside of that he was a gleeful camper collecting Hershey's Bars and Milky Ways like a real pro.

A funny incident occurred at a home around the block from us. As we approached the porch, I noticed all the lights were on and though the storm door was closed, the inside door was open. When Elijah rang the doorbell a huge Saint Bernard dog started barking and jumping up on the door. Elijah, whose fear of dogs is only matched by Sarah's fear of spiders, ran back to my side as fast as he could. We waited for a moment or so and just before we were ready to go on a woman opened the door and beckoned us with four large chocolate bars (two Nestle Crunches and two Hershey with Almonds) which Elijah bravely took and placed into his pumpkin carrier. It was almost as if we were being tested (don't let the dog scare you away and your reward we be giant candy bars) and we passed. In fact, for the next fifteen minutes, the existence and whereabouts of those two Crunch bars were Elijah's only concern.

So how successful was this year's Halloween? I'll let you know after Elijah visits the dentist in a couple of months.

TO INFINITY AND BEYOND.....or at least to the house on the next block with the Crunch bars!

Alex, I'll take geography for $300

We just got back from visiting family (plus some friends and clients) in Los Angeles, where the temperature was in the 90s and the air was the same color as the hills -- brown. Although we did our usual driving all over town, we also spent more time at our "home base" (my sister's house) than we normally do, and that made this trip more relaxing. (There will be a more detailed post on this subject in a few days.)

On the flight out to L.A., Elijah, using the markers and the ream of paper we brought on board, drew many things. Most important to him was his map of "the United Stades of America" shown below:

If you can't quite make it out, the purple states are Texas and Colorado, and while I have no idea where he thinks the "State of News" is, I can tell him that it isn't a place to be right now.

Though you can't tell from this map, the amount of beachfront property available in Kansas is very limited. And in Elijah's world, that coast-to-coast flight from "York" to "Caforina" sure seems a lot easier. No matter, Elijah was extremely proud of his map, and, during our trip, needed to know where it was on a daily basis.

Our little guy's career as a cartographer continued when we got home, but this time it was global in nature...

Naturally, Washington plays a major role in world affairs and can't be ignored, but its placement is telling. Florida has to be on there, because that's where Mickey Mouse lives, and besides, without Florida, what would be the purpose of spring break? Mexico is where Mom's favorite drink (magaritas) comes from. And Kansas proudly sits right there on top of the world.

After all, there's no place like home.

Emotional Rescue

A byproduct of Elijah's autism is his occasional inability to understand emotions. If we are out somewhere and a child is crying, he will stare intently, smile and say, "Daddy, (s)he is upset." And he fully understands when we are angry; when either Sarah or I raise our voices, he knows he has crossed a certain line. (Admittedly, that line is a lot further out for me than for Sarah, which he also comprehends very well.)

As part of his therapy, he is being shown pictures of facial expressions and asked to convey what emotions are being expressed. Since he was toddler, there has been a poster up in his room with pictures of children showing wide ranges of emotions. He had commented on this poster before (and impersonated the different facial expressions shown) but the new emphasis on reading emotions has inspired Elijah to a series of artistic endeavors as shown below:













































Notice the reason for his pride....the medal on his chest!


But my absolute favorite is this one for obvious reasons:

A Cold Day in........Kansas

Although it was indeed a very cold day, Sarah, Elijah and I made our way to the Kansas Speedway for the Autism Speaks Walk. I don't know what it is about autism walks and the weather, but the previous two times I have participated in this type of event, the weather has been horrible. The first time, it sleeted -- with a wind-chill factor in single digits -- and the other time, rain poured down as if we were in a monsoon.

But because I felt it was our duty to go, I dragged Sarah and Elijah out in the cold. Elijah had a great time (the fact that he was in the wagon the entire two-mile walk, wrapped in warm blankets, didn't hurt) and with TWO moonwalks to jump and slide on, how could he not? Dad had a pretty good time as well, as I got to talk with some people on some autism-related issues and see my little guy laugh and smile. Even Mom, who was tired and cold, eventually got into the spirit of things.

With a "Fall Festival" scheduled for tomorrow at a large metropolitan park, and the weather forecasters saying it will be the same type of day, I know my work is cut out for me if I want to convince Sarah to come with us. But somehow, when she is sitting in the warmth of our home seeing the smile on his face in these pictures, Sarah gets a little more willing to join our little astronaut on another "moonwalk."

Bouncing around in his favorite spot....inside a moon walk.

Curb Your Enthusiasm

The title of this post has three meanings. First, as a homage to one of my all-time top three favorite television series (the two others are "Taxi" and "The Larry Sanders Show"), which returned to the air this week.

Second, for those of you who read and enjoy this blog and want to know why it isn't updated more often, understand we love the fact that you read our meanderings, but with both of us working and taking care of Elijah, the time left for creating these short masterpieces is limited.

Last, the title of this post is what I want to tell Elijah whenever Mary Poppins or an inflated moonwalk is available ...

With that out of the way, I will now bring you up to date.

As Sarah has mentioned previously, Elijah has started kindergarten, and it appears he is doing pretty well. He seems to enjoy his class and the after-school care program he goes to three times a week. Fortunately for us, most of his odd observations and behavior seem to be confined to our home.

As an example, Sarah mentioned to me that one day he announced he had to go to the restroom. Nothing wrong there, but when she thought he had been gone too long, she opened the door to find him standing on the sink looking at himself in the mirror, completely naked except for a strand of Mardi Gras beads around his neck. New Orleans, here we come!!

The bathroom seems to be a source of constant material for the little guy. Another day he told Sarah that the shape of the toilet looked like an arm on each side, which meant the bowl would be the person's head, when one lifted the lid, they would go "pee pee in that person's mouth!" Who knew? And I won't even get started on Elijah's fear of loud toilets, in which a Wendy's restroom off the interstate is in his mind is as horrible as Jason, Hannibal Lecter and Al Capone combined.

As I mentioned earlier, Mary Poppins is more popular around here than ice cream, with Elijah singing and dancing along with every song in this two-hour-plus opus.

(By the way, I didn't remember that there was a song or dance every five minutes of the movie, which is important only because Elijah insists we dance with him. Talk about an aerobic workout!)

His fascination with words and a certain song in the movie is evident here and was also written on a blackboard in a classroom at a temple we were attending for a special-needs program. The rabbi was so stunned she took pictures to show the congregation. (The printing on the board was much neater and in a straight line, which made it even more impressive.)

Elijah's love of this movie knows no bounds, and he expresses it in many ways. To mimic the "penguin dance," he will pull his pants down (just like Dick Van Dyke) as well as dance on his knees. The rooftop dance scene with the chimney sweeps is another favorite, with Elijah doing high kicks and a balancing dance step that would qualify him for a role in "A Chorus Line."

But his artistic side is also inspired by Mary. The following are just a few of his drawings from the film:

The hat rack Mary pulls out of her suitcase...

The lamp Mary pulls out next...

and his drawing of Old Man Dawes, who died laughing....

A short time later, another drawing appeared in our den, which I thought was also inspired by Mary Poppins. When I asked Elijah if this was his interpretation of the dance sequence "Step in Time" I was told no, that this had nothing to do with the movie.

"So what is it?" I asked.

"He's going to the restroom!" was the reply, and if you look closely, you can definitely spot the anatomy needed and the action occurring.

But it hasn't all been nothing but "a jolly holiday with Mary" around here. As I mentioned, we attended a program at a local temple with the preparation for the event stressing out Dad as he was trying to get the little guy dressed and ready. And because the little guy loves to remember and repeat songs and phrases that he hears, I probably shouldn't, while frustrated in getting him ready, utter the phrase "God damn it". (Yes, I know that seems mild, but just the previous week, without any warning, Elijah let loose, in an matter-of-fact way, a profanity-laced tirade dealing with spilled coffee. Since neither he nor I drink coffee or work at a Starbucks, it is quite obvious whom he heard it from.)

Sure enough, later that day at the grocery store, Elijah was riding in the large part of the cart drinking some water after his usual free cookie from the bakery, when Dad banged the cart against a display case (please no comments about my hitting stationary objects, even with a shopping cart). That action caused the following reaction from Elijah; "God damn it .... the water's cold!" Now mind you, this wasn't shouted in anger, but said in pure disgust with the situation. And as if to show that this wasn't a short-term memory situation, it repeated itself two weeks later. While he was eating a bowl of carrots in the back seat on the way to the gym, the bowl fell to the car floor as I took a corner a little too fast. "God damn it, the carrots are on the floor!" was Elijah's understated response, and though I know I shouldn't, I had to smile just a bit.

Interesting observations have become the norm for Elijah lately. A couple of examples: One day last week, completely out of the blue, he mentioned to Sarah that "somebody had two babies and six babies on 'Jon & Kate Plus Eight!' " A couple of days later, noticing the difference in height between Sarah and me as we were all walking down a hallway, he commented that "Daddy needs to be taller."

He also is greeting people with his killer smile and saying the right things. (Upon seeing a classroom assistant from a previous semester, he hugged her and said, "Hi, sweetie.")

All in all, it has been a great summer and a good start to the fall. As Sarah mentioned earlier, he loves school and he has already charmed the Y-Care (YMCA after-school program) people and the new therapists he is working with. He is talking more and wants to play with (or at least alongside) the neighborhood kids. There are festivals aplenty coming up in the next few weeks, all of which involve moonwalks, so he should have that big smile on his face for quite awhile. (The picture at the top of this post was from one such festival this week.)

Lastly, as a point of parental privilege, I have bought the items needed for his Halloween costume this year. Just like his daddy was 45 years ago, he will be the chimney sweep from "Mary Poppins." When he puts on the hat and starts to twirl the broom, all I can say is, "God damn it, he's cute!"