O.J. Simpson.....still not a Jew

When the holiday season rolls around, Sarah insists on Christmas CDs in the car. Nothing wrong with that, not with Bruce Springsteen's Santa Claus is Coming to Town and Merry Christmas, Baby available; along with Adam Sandler's Chanukah Song (from which the title of this blog posting was taken) on a disc made by a heathen friend of mine. So with Nat King Cole as background music, Sarah and I set off to make the holidays special for little guy.


Since Chanukah came early this year, Elijah got a head start on the presents and the "gelt" (chocolate coins, for those like O.J.). On the first night, Elijah got a new Tramp figurine (to replace the one he broke years ago) to go with his Lady. He was so happy he carried it with him for all eight nights (and beyond). He also got more markers, a goofball (don't even ask) and from our friend Bunni (whom I always refer to as his surrogate Grandma), he got Nutcracker figurines, which along with Lady and Tramp made their way from room to room.

My gift from Elijah was his continuing progress (a big-shout out to his therapists and school!) and his ability to recite the Hebrew prayer as we lit the candles on the menorah. Considering the fact that probably no one else in my family can do that, I was very pleased.




With the arrival of Christmas and a record snowstorm on the same day, inside was where we spent most of the day. (Sarah and Elijah in their Christmas pajamas, Daddy in sweats.) There was a quick foray into the backyard to play in the snow (wind chills in the minus territory brought me in before the little guy; Sarah never even made it to the door).




Santa was good to Elijah. He got a beloved basketball goal (indoor variety), on which he has been practicing his dribble drive to the hoop. An indoor trampoline, which has yet to be assembled. (According to the instructions, assembly takes "three strong adults," which we are two short of in the house, although Sarah's bad knee gives her an excuse.) More markers, a couple of yo-yos, some games that he has played and enjoyed with his therapists in the past and an overhead projector that allows Elijah to trace more than 200 images and animals. Of course, this list doesn't include the extremely generous contributions of family members toward Elijah's camp fund, a gift he is not aware of now but will enjoy a great deal next year. (We have been assured the camp is on track again for next summer!)

And just today Aunt Julie and Uncle George came by and not only brought Elijah his first video game play station, but also aided in assembling the trampoline, which put a huge smile on the little guy's face

So as the holiday weekend winds down and I go out to shovel the driveway so Sarah can get to work (I don't have to get out in this mess). I have to say it was truly "the most wonderful time of the year."

Except for this ....

Two Birds in the Hand.....

Using his artistic ability to interpret everyday objects is one of Elijah's many charms. When the moment moves him , he will create a picture based on some small phrase or object that most others wouldn't even take note of. Such an event occurred the other night when he climbed up on the bookcase in our den and got off the shelf two brass bird statues that have done nothing but collect dust for at least 10 years.

His fascination with these birds is not new. On numerous occasions over the past few years, he has insisted that "Daddy get the gold birds for Elijah" so he can place them in various areas around the house. Yesterday, however, when the request came, it was immediately followed by another query asking for markers and paper.

What follows is Elijah's Men as Birds masterpiece:

Why Kung Fu Panda is no Winnie the Pooh

I will admit that I enjoy watching movies more than reading. I also will fess up to enjoying the films To Kill a Mockingbird and The Godfather more than the novels, although in both cases it was incredible performances that made it so. I can also state, I think without too much debate, that perhaps the worst film adaptation of a great book was Bonfire of the Vanities, which turned one of the lead characters, an old Yiddish judge, into Morgan Freeman (?!) thus destroying one of the major subplots.


So I was somewhat hesitant when I took Elijah to go see the film version of Where the Wild Things Are, a classic children's book that consists of maybe 100 words, yet was over an hour and a half long as a movie. We had already experienced Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, which besides the title, shared little with the book we read together on many nights. My fears about the Maurice Sendak classic turned out to be well founded. Although Elijah seemed to enjoy the movie (though restlessness was evident on occasion) the charm of the book was completely lost in the midst of what I would call a movie not about childhood escape but about monster angst.

As draining as watching the tortured souls of the "Wild Things" was (the anguish of new friends, old relationships and anger management were constant topics for discussion), it was a joy compared to the "live action" versions of the Dr. Seuss classics How the Grinch Stole Christmas and The Cat in the Hat. Whoever was responsible for those travesties needs to be locked in a room for a weekend and be forced to view them over and over again.

Since Elijah's arrival, I have watched enough cartoons and kids movies to revisit my childhood many times over (OK, I'll admit I owned a lot of those films already) and unlike most of today's stuff, it holds up pretty well. Even after viewing the cartoon Grinch numerous times, both Elijah and I can still enjoy it a great deal, which is not the case with just a repeat viewing of Fly Me to the Moon (even with the 3-D). The Disney "Classics," the original Horton Hears a Who cartoon, and the Peanuts Trilogy (Charlie Brown Christmas, Thanksgiving and Great Pumpkin) show what a child's cartoon film should be about....entertaining fun, memorable music and no more than 80 minutes long.

California.... There We Went

First off I have to apologize to any blog purists who may peruse this site. I am probably violating every rule of blog etiquette by posting out of chronological order, as my previous entry concerned Halloween and our trip out west was the prior week. If everybody is okay with that...let's head for L.A.

Airplane travel with Elijah, though challenging at times, had been made much easier by markers, loads of paper and a portable DVD player (pictured above) loaded with a supply of his favorite films. In fact, concern about his behavior actually has made flying more enjoyable for me as I don't have time for my usual airplane neuroses to kick in. So after a non-eventual flight (unless one considers the reshaping of the United States important - check out the previous post on that subject) we arrived at LAX to begin our real trek, the drive to the Valley.

We all remember those math questions from our school days that started, "If a train leaves from the station at 1:00 traveling at 80 miles per hour and a car leaving from an opposite direction travels at 60 miles per hour, they will meet where?" but on this last trip I discovered a new variation on this theme. If a plane leaves Kansas City going to LAX and at the same time a family in a rental car leaves LAX for the San Fernando Valley, who will arrive at their destination first? The answer: Although the flight was the quicker trip, the time differential was less than 20 minutes.

Okay, now that I got my traffic gripe out of the way, I'd have to say that this was one of our best trips back home. We stayed with my sister and her husband, whose generosity knew no bounds. Our base camp for the trip was their guest house (or, as Elijah called it, "the little house at Aunt Kathy's") which not only afforded us privacy and a pool for little guy to jump into, but also relieved us from the stress of us worrying about (very) early morning risings and the effect on our hosts. We spent lots of time with family and kept our driving to a minimal amount (in Los Angeles terms). And the weather was incredible...shorts everyday and a comfortable beach day in LATE OCTOBER!

Elijah battled the waves to a draw but vowed to return and beat them back from the shore at our next beach visit.

As with any trip with a child, there were a couple of meltdowns (one involving a hysterical Elijah using a public restroom had me fearful of authorities busting into our stall and taking me away in cuffs) but as he always does, our little guy adapted to his surroundings and had a good time. He got to see Grandma and Grandpa (whom he now recognizes) again, as well as Uncles Ken and Marv and Aunt Kathy. He also got to visit "Miss Judy's house," meet cousins and dance one more time with Doctor Branch, a client of mine who just turned 101.

He also got to leave his mark as an artist, as a blue IHOP sign and various color drawings he created were left up on walls until our departure (note to Aunt Kathy and Miss Judy, I won't tell Elijah if you want to take them down now). As I said before, it was a great trip and just one more step on Elijah's path of life.

To Infinity......and Beyond

As Halloween approached this year, we were faced with a problem -- a child who did not want to be in costume or go trick-or-treating. The idea of dressing Elijah as a chimney sweep (never high on Sarah's list) had fallen off the radar as the Little Guy (finally) tired of "Mary Poppins." Since he was constantly going around the house dancing and singing "If I Only Had a Brain" from the the Wizard of Oz, I thought dressing up as the Scarecrow would interest Elijah, but that idea was also met with indifference. It got so bad that Sarah asked the teacher at Elijah's school if there was a way to opt out of class on the Friday before Halloween, as everybody was supposed to be costume for a school parade.

I've heard of parents asking that their children be excused from, say, sex education classes, but Halloween parties and parades? That's a new one! Then I got an idea. On the plane ride out to Los Angeles and numerous times while we were there, Elijah had asked to watch "Toy Story." He was so enamored of the film that I had to ask him, "Would you like to be Buzz Lightyear for Halloween?" Just like in a Hail Mary pass at the end of a game, we connected, with a resounding "YES!" from the Little Guy. So two days before the big day, we sojourned to a costume store and got one of the last Buzz Lightyear costumes available.

To say Elijah got into the holiday spirit would be a minor understatement. He couldn't wait to put on his costume and reap the rewards. There was a show-and-tell scheduled for his class the same day as the parade and he eagerly rehearsed his speech using his "Woody" doll, but later wanted it amended to include Jessie (another character from the film). Also, according to Sarah, he was quite proud when some other kids pointed out how "cool" his costume was.

But that was a controlled environment as opposed to the dog-eat-dog world of neighborhood trick-or-treating, but my fears were unfounded. I am happy to report that an exercise that usually took all of twenty minutes and included maybe a half dozen houses, was a two hour excursion that took in most of our immediate neighborhood. Proudly announcing "My name is Buzz Lightyear and I come in peace" or Buzz's catchphrase (the title of this blog), the little guy happily rang doorbells and collected candy.

Of course there were a couple of minor faux pas. One was Elijah's insistence of not just standing on the porch of a house but walking right in and taking a look around. Another was his lack of understanding that the bowl of candy being offered was not just for him exclusively, and that he wasn't suppose to grab a handful at every house. But outside of that he was a gleeful camper collecting Hershey's Bars and Milky Ways like a real pro.

A funny incident occurred at a home around the block from us. As we approached the porch, I noticed all the lights were on and though the storm door was closed, the inside door was open. When Elijah rang the doorbell a huge Saint Bernard dog started barking and jumping up on the door. Elijah, whose fear of dogs is only matched by Sarah's fear of spiders, ran back to my side as fast as he could. We waited for a moment or so and just before we were ready to go on a woman opened the door and beckoned us with four large chocolate bars (two Nestle Crunches and two Hershey with Almonds) which Elijah bravely took and placed into his pumpkin carrier. It was almost as if we were being tested (don't let the dog scare you away and your reward we be giant candy bars) and we passed. In fact, for the next fifteen minutes, the existence and whereabouts of those two Crunch bars were Elijah's only concern.

So how successful was this year's Halloween? I'll let you know after Elijah visits the dentist in a couple of months.

TO INFINITY AND BEYOND.....or at least to the house on the next block with the Crunch bars!

Alex, I'll take geography for $300

We just got back from visiting family (plus some friends and clients) in Los Angeles, where the temperature was in the 90s and the air was the same color as the hills -- brown. Although we did our usual driving all over town, we also spent more time at our "home base" (my sister's house) than we normally do, and that made this trip more relaxing. (There will be a more detailed post on this subject in a few days.)

On the flight out to L.A., Elijah, using the markers and the ream of paper we brought on board, drew many things. Most important to him was his map of "the United Stades of America" shown below:

If you can't quite make it out, the purple states are Texas and Colorado, and while I have no idea where he thinks the "State of News" is, I can tell him that it isn't a place to be right now.

Though you can't tell from this map, the amount of beachfront property available in Kansas is very limited. And in Elijah's world, that coast-to-coast flight from "York" to "Caforina" sure seems a lot easier. No matter, Elijah was extremely proud of his map, and, during our trip, needed to know where it was on a daily basis.

Our little guy's career as a cartographer continued when we got home, but this time it was global in nature...

Naturally, Washington plays a major role in world affairs and can't be ignored, but its placement is telling. Florida has to be on there, because that's where Mickey Mouse lives, and besides, without Florida, what would be the purpose of spring break? Mexico is where Mom's favorite drink (magaritas) comes from. And Kansas proudly sits right there on top of the world.

After all, there's no place like home.

Emotional Rescue

A byproduct of Elijah's autism is his occasional inability to understand emotions. If we are out somewhere and a child is crying, he will stare intently, smile and say, "Daddy, (s)he is upset." And he fully understands when we are angry; when either Sarah or I raise our voices, he knows he has crossed a certain line. (Admittedly, that line is a lot further out for me than for Sarah, which he also comprehends very well.)

As part of his therapy, he is being shown pictures of facial expressions and asked to convey what emotions are being expressed. Since he was toddler, there has been a poster up in his room with pictures of children showing wide ranges of emotions. He had commented on this poster before (and impersonated the different facial expressions shown) but the new emphasis on reading emotions has inspired Elijah to a series of artistic endeavors as shown below:













































Notice the reason for his pride....the medal on his chest!


But my absolute favorite is this one for obvious reasons: